Wednesday, June 24, 2009

My moment of truth

It's so easy to post someone else's before photo! So hard to post your own. But here goes.

A few weeks ago, I mentioned a "triggering event" that made me realize I had to do something about my weight. It was this photo. My husband took it of Evan and me heading down the sidewalk on his first day of kindergarten.

I thought that I would cherish this photo forever. That it would go into a photo album that we would leaf through with pleasure. That through the years it would call up memories of sweet times with our son.

NOT! When I saw this, this is what I thought: How can this possibly be me? The shock of it is so great, I don't even see my beautiful son, can't remember my thoughts on that walk. It's a moment that is forever lost to me. It makes me sad.

But, ultimately, this photo does document a turning point. Not the one I was expecting--a rite of passage for my son--but one that changed the direction of my own life. It took me another year to act, but eventually this photo provided the punch in the gut (or really, the butt) I needed to take charge of my health and weight.

Maybe one day, I'll be able to look at this photo with pride, both for myself and my son. It's been almost six years, though, and I still can't bear to look at it. I haven't really taken an after photo yet--certainly not one from behind! But I've lost 30 pounds so far and have just 5 to go. I'll post a true after shot soon. Maybe I'll actually be able to look at that one!


  1. Hi Nancy, just found your blog and am enjoying your writing. I can see how that photo would 'shock' a young woman, but please please learn to look at it with pride. That is a precious picture of a good mother with a darling little boy. Just my opinion, of course...

  2. You're very kind... especially the part about the "young woman"! Fortunately, we have other pictures from the day that I do enjoy.